3 month check in

weeks 11 & 12

week 11 - perfect.  everything went great.  no complaints.  actually it went better than expected and i made progress in several ways

week 12 - started well.  had the potential to be wonderful.  get this, due to circumstances beyond my control, circumstances im still to this moment trying to figure out, complete & utter disaster.  everything ive done in the last 12 weeks was absolutely unraveled. 

why?  i still am not clear on that.  i felt like this was totally out of my control even though i had done everything right.  id done everything according to plan.  and things were just getting better & better.  so wtf happened??!  

im angry, im confused, im frustrated and to this moment, every time i replay it, im not sure what i couldve done different to save this one.  i know life throws you curve balls, gives you lemons & isn't fair, but this was so messy.  i feel totally sideswiped.  and a bit betrayed by this whole plan. 

again, i will never go into details about all the overall basis of this secret plan, i will say this:  i finally find a plan i believe in, i find something to try, i find something im excited about and it blows up.  at my 3 month point, one day blows up the last 3 months.  can i come back from it?  only next week's blog entry will tell, i guess. 

who dat??

so i gave in and started "doctor who".  ive heard soooo much recently about it and ive been putting off watching a particular episode that aired like 5 years ago but my BFF keeps telling me to watch.

so i did.  and now im hooked. :)  i feel like ive caught up on something that everyone else was in on.  AND 'shaun of the dead"s mom is in it! as was carey mulligan, kylie minogue and sharon osbourne. AND the first Doctor in this series is the war-torn husband from "The Others".  :)  but really?  the walking dead's 'governor"? 

cool effects for a tv show, a very christmas-centric show.  actually scary looking aliens, creepy scarecrows, ticking masquerade people and the most real life werewolf ive seen in a long time.  and a reference to the san andreas fault?  whats not to love?!  i havent yet decided which doctor i like best though...

nor which travel companion i like best!!  you get used to one and then it switches and then you get used to another and then another doctor and then etc etc!!!  im officially hooked.

"why make a scribble creature?"

week 10 - an update

still going good.  however, there hasnt been much opportunity to screw things up right now.  but ill take what i can get.  i am learning to adapt to behavior that seems to be getting me where  i want to be.  and the more i do it, the easier it becomes.

im cornered...

so ive got this corner on the kitchen table where i dump things
coupons
mail
things to take care of
to do lists
books
loose photos
newspaper articles
credit card receipts & statements
miscellaneous paper items

this morning i looked at it & decided its time to get rid of this.  i organized...i sorted...i threw out

it took me like 15 minutes & presto.  the only things there now are what i have to put in the car and my keys. :)

week 9 - thru march 6...

i did good this week.  everything went according to plan.

this week went a bit different though, with majority of my week being my own time and not enough opportunity to test my reactions.

but when i did have the opportunities to screw up, i didn't,
little by little, im gaining little bits of control.
and week 10 is going to be similar as may be week 11.
we'll see. :)